Sunday, April 18, 2021
Home Features Ask Jill

Ask Jill

Dear Jill,
My boyfriend is studying abroad in Italy this quarter and I’m here studying at UCI. I like my freedom and I know he’s having a blast in Rome. The thing is, I seem to get a bit overly jealous when I read his e-mails, because he’s going to all these ‘amazing’ places and I’m here in Irvine just seeing the usual. I’m afraid that when it’s time to come home, he won’t want to, or whether we will still be able to ‘mesh’ well. Do you think I am being overly worried for no reason?
-Lost in Love

Dear Lost,
Try to put yourself in his position for a minute. Yes, he’s seeing some of the world’s most amazing sights, but he’s also in a foreign country more than 30,000 miles away from home and from the most important people in his life. Understandably, it’s hard to be happy for him, because it’s not like he can relate with the pave-the-perfectly-good-streets-every-week environment that is Irvine.
If you can’t be happy for him, you can feel sorry for him. He’s probably wrecking his shoes on those cobblestone streets and being called ‘stupid American’ every time he speaks. I don’t know if this makes you feel any better, but hey, he gets to see the Trevi Fountain and you get to speak with your American accent without being hanged.
And yes, as someone whose boyfriend is going to be in London for a year, I understand your concerns. So, no, you’re not being overly worried.
First of all, he will come back because while I’m sure Italy is awesome, it’s not home. Just hope those European girls don’t shave.
Second of all, if he’s only going for a semester, I’m sure he’s not going to be a completely different person when he comes back. He’ll probably be worldly, but you’re the person he’s going to want to tell all his stories to. He’s still going to be the same person, so unless he comes back an Italian mob boss, I wouldn’t be too worried.

Dear Jill,
I just broke up with my boyfriend, who goes to UCI as well. Whenever I see him, I feel like we are still together and that nothing has changed. I know I should give myself time to be apart from him so that I don’t miss him as much. How long should I wait before we start hanging out as friends again?
-Hard to Say Goodbye

Dear Goodbye,
Give yourself a pat on the back because you’ve got half the battle over with so far. You’ve actually realized that you need to stop spending so much time with him. What most