Video ‘Hofessionals,’ I Salute You and Your Short Shorts

Food, shelter, clothing and water are all trivial things that I could surely live without. But take away my video hofessionals and you might as well take away my soul and send me into a downward spiral of binge eating, substance abuse and an overall expressway headed for self-destruction.
I get the shakes without my daily fix of slow-motion shots of the backside of girls shaking what God gave them in short shorts. As we watch every muscle of their thighs ripple and drip with Cristal for that moment it feels like there is no war, poverty or hole in the ozone layer.
You don’t even have to be into girls to appreciate the beauty of the video hofessional. I like boys and yet I’m still enthralled with their ability to simply be in these music videos. They just have to stand there with some gangsta looking fellow standing behind them with his hands on their hips, swaying back and forth somewhat abruptly.
As seen on VH1, BET, MTV, MTV2 or even MTV U, for that matter, video hofessionals are a staple of mainstream hip-hop and rap music videos. No matter what the song is about