Drawn and Quoted

A Self-Proclaimed Victim: “What is it that I did that is so fundamentally wrong, that deserves this kind of response to my service? … I consider myself a casualty, one of the many casualties of the war on terror,” said former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales in an interview with The Wall Street Journal. It shouldn’t be surprising that Gonzales is in denial about why he is perceived so negatively, especially when one considers he famously repeated (to the point of absurdity) “I don’t recall” throughout his testimony to Congress for his role in the scandals that marked his tenure as Attorney General at the Justice Department. Gonzales claims he is writing a memoir to set the record straight, but if he can’t “recall” his involvement in the politicization of the Justice Department, warrantless wiretapping and the approval of torture, his book should be as skittish as his memory. Following his resignation, Gonzales reportedly has been unable to find work as a lawyer. As Jason Linkins wrote for the Huffington Post, “In America, when you cannot find a group of lawyers to stand by you, that’s saying something.”
A Christmas Miracle: “This legislation secures much-needed protection for lesbian and gay couples. Our community faces unique challenges in preparing for retirement because we are denied Social Security spousal and survivor benefits. Protecting our hard-earned retirement savings is even more crucial to us, and until now, the tax code made it that much harder,” said Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese after President Goerge W. Bush signed the Worker, Retiree and Employer Recovery Act of 2008 just before Christmas, which will force employers to roll over retirement benefits to an employee’s surviving same-sex partner without facing tax penalties. Perhaps it was the holiday season that made Bush charitable enough to sign the gay rights bill.
A New Year’s Resolution: “‘People should not be drinking so much that they wake up in [the] hospital. We would urge them to think more carefully about the consequences of drinking so that they can enjoy the start of 2009 safely and responsibly,” said Alistair Drummond, a British police spokesman after it was reported that the police and ambulance control centers received calls every seven seconds due to alcohol-related incidents during New Year’s Eve festivities.