360

Douchebag of the Week: “Something that’s quite a strong contrast to the gangster rappers and the thug life people that we see so often on TV,” said a Fox News anchor in one of many examples of inspiring commentary from the network during Barack Obama’s inauguration as our new president. After eight years of the hilarity that was the Bush presidency, I wondered how Fox News would cover the incoming black President (my hope was Bill O’Reilly’s head would explode). Clearly, they are tackling the situation with grace and tact. No wait, they’re doing whatever the opposite of that is. Like teens on prom night, the Fox News team made it blatantly obvious that they have no idea what they’re doing when it comes to commenting on such a momentous occasion. With Bush gone, it’ll be laughable to see Fox News attempt to maintain some semblance of dignity in its reporting, but maybe if they’re lucky Dick Cheney will shoot someone again and they can spin it as his own personal battle against terrorism.
Beating a Dead Horse: “Say it! O-B-A-M-A. You are Correct!” are the lyrics in the over-hyped “Aer Obama” song, which features a mash-up of Daft Punk’s “Aerodynamic” and Adam Freeland’s … well I’m still not sure what Adam Freeland did. Does adding six robotic sounding words to a song really count for, well, anything? It is nice to see the popularity of Daft Punk on the rise, albeit eight years after the fact. Yes, the “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger” remix with Kayne West is pretty cool. But it was even cooler without Kayne when I was listening to it in high school … as a freshman … on Toonami. The real question is: Will it take 15 years before people decide to go out and pick up “Human After All”? I’m still waiting for the Daft Punk/Vanilla Ice mash-up. You know that idea is genius.
Things that Matter: “We will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist,” said President Obama in his inaugural speech. On a day that couldn’t come soon enough for many Americans, Obama proved that he certainly has his work cut out for him. Despite two wars, a slowing economy, an explosive Middle East and Israel taking a page from the American playbook (pre-emption anyone?), the president’s administration still possesses an air of hope and confidence for many in the country. The White House is already starting to see a return of academics to its halls, as opposed to right-wing Christian zealots. Even old man Castro seems happy with America’s new President, though maybe he realizes that after he goes, so goes a Communist Cuba, and he just wants to win over some bonus points before the big sleep. In any case, the world seems ready to welcome back an America that’s willing to talk some things out before, you know, invading other countries.

In this article