Single? Ready To Mingle? How To Calm Your Nerves To Finally Do It!
In the age of e-mail, IMs and Facebook, what’s a guy with a crush to do? Talking to a cute girl is never easy, but luckily the Internet has made it somewhat less difficult. So, take the wimpy way out and do it via the web!
Step 1: Make Contact
So there’s this girl, right? Yeah, she’s pretty cute. She’s making eye contact, laughing at your stupid jokes … score! Since this is the beginning, you don’t want to mess up. You want to do this right!
If you want, you can go straight for the number. To do this, you must be fairly certain she’s interested. Sometimes it’s nice when a guy just asks, with no false pretenses — just a simple, “Let’s go out, what’s your number?” (Okay, maybe something a little more eloquent than that). But sometimes that can come on a bit strong, and girls like to be wooed. So, after the initial contact, get her screen name. Or, at the very least, get her last name so you can Facebook (stalk) her.
Step 2: Chat it up
Let’s assume you do the Facebook thing. Click “Add as friend” and you’re in! Look at her info and do a little background research. Hey, she likes that band, too? Awesome. File that info away — don’t ever let it slip that you actually read her info, but now you have some fodder to cleverly sneak into a conversation: “Yeah, I was listening to the new ______ album last night. ….NO WAY! You like them, too? My favorite song is ______,” etc.
Step 3: Be there
Say you met this girl in class. Or through a club. Or through a friend. Or on the bus. You’re Facebook friends now, so you can start to be acquaintances in life. And you’re going to want to establish this face time if you can. If you can see her, do it. If you can’t, that’s why there’s instant messaging.
Be friendly in person, and even friendlier online. If you’re confident enough in your taste, send a few funny links. Entertain her, as if to say, “Hey I’m a fun guy! I’d be a fun date!” Establish some rapport, and then let her know you’re interested in actually getting to know her.
Step 4: Take the plunge
Gauge the situation, and eventually, ask her out, preferably in person. This is scary, but it’s mainly for your benefit. I’m just watching out for you, man. You’re going to want to see her reaction, because you’ll be able to tell if it’s a green light, or a yellow.
Not ready to hit the streets yet? Sure, you can ask her out online (if you must). Bring up a movie you want to see, or a restaurant you want to try. Ask her if she wants to go. If she says yes, be cautiously excited. She might just be nice, but she wouldn’t see you if she didn’t at least think you were an OK guy, so you’re pretty much in. (If you had asked in person, it would be easier to tell her level of interest, but it’s okay, I understand that there’s a reason you’re still single. OH, I kid. You’re awesome. Don’t ever doubt yourself!)
If she says no, take a step back. If she says no, but seems like she’d be willing to go some other time, definitely go for it. Don’t think about it that much, just do it.
Step 5: Recovery
At this point, you either got the date or you didn’t. If you didn’t, she’s probably just not that into you. It’s up to you whether or not you want to continue the friendship. Being a friend pretty much ensures that you’re never going to get more than an “Aw, you’re an awesome friend!” Hug! But hey, you can dream big, and crazier things than friends hooking up have happened. Just don’t hold your breath. And if you do, be prepared to hold it for a while. Eventually you’ll start hanging out together, but as just friends. Warning: this option usually sucks.
Step 6: Move on
So, you tried a couple times, and you could keep trying, but don’t be an idiot. Find another cute girl. Stop seeing this one, even as a friend, if you’re not noticing any other cute girls. There are ALWAYS cute girls, and you are just blinded by your crush. Gently extract yourself from the situation, and seriously, find someone else. Then start the process all over! Isn’t dating fun?
Girls, don’t just sit back and make him do all the work! Here’s how to get the man you’re interested in!
Step 1: (The first and only step): Just do it!
You know how girls kind of like to be wooed? Well, guys often just want the date. So get in a flirty mood, put on some lip gloss, and go for it. And hey, if he says no, it’s not like you wanted to date a guy who didn’t have the guts to ask you out anyway!