Anteaters Rumble with the Wolves

Led by Peter, Skeeter and Aunt Anteater, the Anteaters fended off a mysterious pack of wolves from Nevada, 84-81.

Believed to have escaped from the Las Vegas Zoo, as there are no longer wild wolves in the state, the wolves descended upon the Anteaters’ Lair, awakening the typically sleepy and bumbling beast.

“Have you ever heard the wolf cry to the blue corn moon? It’s quite the experience,” a shaken Peter said. “Luckily, we knew that if you cut the sycamore down, then you’ll never know how tall it will grow. And you’ll never hear the wolf cry to the blue corn moon.”

The Anteaters started out on the defensive, dropping into a 1-3-1 zone, as they were afraid of the wolves running past them. Luckily, the wolves seemed to be constantly distracted with random dancing.

“My name is Dances with Wolves,” one of the wolves said, upon being questioned. “I will not talk to you anymore. You are not worth talking to.”
The Anteaters, besides relying on their signature snout swipe and bushy tail beating, were able to come out on top despite an incredible sense of camaraderie among the wolves.

“I tend to think of myself as a one-man wolf pack,” Big Bad said. “But when [I met Benicio Del Toro], I knew he was one of my own. And my wolf pack … it grew by one. So there … there were two of us in the wolf pack…”

The most intense moment in the game occurred when Nevada brought in a substitute right when a full moon appeared.

“I mean, he came in out of no where. Everyone was wondering if they were still the same beast with him in the game,” Skeeter said. “Let’s just say we’re glad we took some of that silver smoothie stuff from my new magic bullet before the game.”

Next up, the Anteaters will take on the Fort Wayne Mad Ants in what should be a delicious exhibition game. No word on the availability of the pre-game meal smoothies has been announced.

“Last time we played them, they really got in our pants, and I mean that in a bad way,” Peter said. “This time, we’re going in there hungry.”