Intimate Inquiries

Dear LL&L regulars,

In honor of the end of “Lost” and the countless lessons on life and love it brought, your wonderful LL&L editors Khassaundra and Emmercelle have stepped down to let two seasoned “Lost” disciples spread the show’s teachings to the romantically beguiled. We appreciate your patience while we discern the great truths of “Lost” for you.

Dear D&C,

I’m ashamed to admit that over the last few years of college I have put on a little weight. My boyfriend doesn’t seem to mind (or if he does, he doesn’t say anything). I feel very self-conscious when we’re having sex and it makes me uncomfortable. What can I do to be more comfortable in my own skin?

-Shy Bunny

Dear Shy,

If your boyfriend doesn’t have a problem with it, he clearly likes you the way you are. In order for you to enjoy sex again, you have to be comfortable with yourself. You should be proud and willing to show it off — because your boyfriend obviously finds you sexy and attractive. Everyone is their own worst critic – like Hurley, stuck on the “Lost” island, who couldn’t believe his great fortune when cute Libby dug his lackadaisical style. Despite rampaging polar bears, ghost whispers and the Black Smoke Monster, Hurley’s greatest fear was being good enough for Libby – which is silly, because EVERYBODY loves Hugo. The only numbers you should be worried about are 4, 8, 15, 16, 23 and 42.

Try talking to your boyfriend about it. He will most likely tell you that he loves you the way you are or encourage you to be a healthy happy person. Hurley is a fun, attractive person because he’s consistently positive and never fails to respond to horrible circumstances with a resolute, “Dude.” If you really feel that you have some major body image issues, consider seeking professional help and counseling.

Love,

D&C

Dear D&C,

I have a really big problem. I think my boyfriend is addicted to porn. It’s to the point where he doesn’t even want to do anything with me; all he wants to do is watch porn. I’ve woken up several times in the middle of the night and found him in the bathroom looking at porn.

I don’t agree with this, but my friends all tell me that all guys look at porn and it’s normal. Am I overreacting?

-Pissed About Porn

Dear PAP,

It sounds like your boyfriend has a pretty serious problem. While looking at porn isn’t abnormal behavior, it seems to be interfering with your relationship. We’re all stuck on a metaphorical island midway between LA and Sydney, and if you don’t have honest intimacy between you and your closest Lostie, you might as well be stuck in a love triangle between you, an uncertain Kate and a surly, grizzled Sawyer-porn stand in.

Your boyfriend may have underlying issues that should be discussed with a mental health professional.

On the other hand, your boyfriend getting up at odd hours of the night is small potatoes compared to having to get up every 108 minutes and input a number to prevent the end of the world. Just sayin’.

Love,

D&C