In Love and War

ever imagined I would have my own Love & Relationship Column in a university newspaper. Since this will be my final love column, I am going to give you two cents worth of my roller coaster love life. Everything I thought I knew about romantic love turned out to be wrong. Being the hopeless romantic that I am, I used to think I would just know when I met “the one.” Obviously, that is far from the case. It takes time. It takes work. A lot of it.

For some strange reason, I seem to be good at maintaining long-term relationships. Well, at least I thought I was good at it. My first relationship lasted for three years. My second serious relationship went on for five years. Oh yeah, I am only twenty-two. These guys have now grown on to become amazing men, just not for me. I think my problem at the time was, I was always trying to make things work even when I knew it was not going to get anywhere. I kept trying. I would always end up feeling stuck. Not to say I didn’t love them because I did, but what I thought they could give me never came around and I just kept waiting for change that would never happen. I finally stopped waiting for change. That breakup led me to the wonderful man that I am with today.

It is funny how life takes you on a few spontaneous flips and turns. For me, it always seems to plop me down the right direction. To make a long story short, the strong ideas of what I want in my lover seem to be portrayed in the man who holds my heart today.

1. He is protective, but not overly. He always sticks up for me.

2. He makes me laugh because he is so cheesy.

3.  He is a huge sweet talker, quite the charmer. His words are backed up with actions.

4. He gives me a different type of confidence.

5. He leads by example. Strong-minded and disciplined, attributes that I need to improve on.

6. He doesn’t give a shit about what anyone thinks. Except for those who matter to him.

7. He believes when I doubt.

8. He is not afraid to call me out.

9. He challenges me to be and do better.

10. He teaches me something new every day.

11. He is a dork.

12. He is open-minded.

13. He loves my imperfections and all.

14. He is patient.

My list for him could go on forever. I am not saying he is perfect because he is not, but he is quite amazing. I don’t think he always knows it either.

Love. I don’t think we ever know where to begin. I am not sure we ever know where we are going with it. But that is the beauty of the journey. It just happens and it is up to us to write our own happy endings.