Satire: UCI’s Greeks Not a Cultural Club
A shocking new poll conducted on campus revealed that many students were unaware that the Greek Fraternity and Sorority groups were not actually cultural clubs.
The Greek life clubs have a well-established presence on campus. There are often booths set up around campus, with members looking to recruit new students into their fold. They have their own housing, and many of the members proudly walk around with the “UCI Greek” T-shirts. The enthusiasm of their members is wonderful to see, although the term “Greek life” seems to have come off as a bit confusing for some students.
“I knew that there was a lot of culture clubs on campus like Latin groups or Asian American clubs, but I was wondering why there were so many Greek clubs on campus,” said Michael, a second-year student.
Mistaken students had multiple points of view for the reasons they were asked to be a part of “Greek life.” Some had thought that they had some facial features that could be mistaken as coming from Greek heritage. Others had thought that some of the fraternities were actually just charity outreach programs for Greek communities.
The results of the poll showed that 23 percent of people had known that the Greeks were fraternities, nine percent had thought they were culture clubs, and 68 percent were late to class.
The Greek life clubs have taken note of the confusion and plan to remedy the situation.
Marco Miranda is a third-year drama major. He can be reached at email@example.com.